Shyness per se is not an abnormal attitude, especially if the shy person is a child. Some children would tend to feel shy if they are surrounded by other kids whom they don’t personally know. But once they would feel at ease a few minutes later, their shyness would eventually go away as they start to mingle and socialize.
However, there are some children who can’t seem to get over their feeling of shyness, which will go through even until they reach adulthood.
These situations have pushed psychologists and psychiatrists to do a comprehensive research about the concept of chronic shyness and its implications on children.
Based on the research conducted by psychologists and psychiatrists, there are three concepts about extreme shyness – normal shyness, social phobia and pathological shyness.
Normal shyness is the shy feeling that majority of people commonly experience, especially when they are put in a strange situation or are surrounded by people they do not know. This kind of shyness is simply a form of temperament, which is also common among adolescence, not only among children, and would usually go away and will resolve by itself after the person is able to process the situation.
Social phobia, on the other hand, is considered an extreme form of behavior. People who have this kind of behavior will avoid all forms of contact with others. They don’t want to mingle and socialize with other people, and they have their reasons. Often times, they avoid socializing because they would feel anxious when they are around other people. This kind of shyness can have a negative effect on the growth and development of a person because as a human being, people should also need to socialize and be with other people, who can help them grow professionally, mentally and spiritually.
Meanwhile, pathological shyness is considered as a psychiatric condition.
People who are suffering from pathological shyness are not able to function normally, particularly in social settings. They consciously avoid going to social functions because they feel they are not socially acceptable and that other people would never get interested in talking with them, for reasons only they know.
Pathologically shy people would not be able to live a normal life and would have difficulty accomplishing many things, especially if these involve interacting with other people.
People who suffer from pathological shyness need to consult a professional who can help them treat the condition and improve their quality of life.
Aside from seeking professional help, people who are extremely shy can also try these simple tips.
Be positive. Think positively and never view anything as a source of anxiety. When in a social gathering, just think that the people around you are humans like you who also have their share of fears and anxieties. When you feel that fear is slowly taking over, take a deep breath. It can help you stay calm.
Try talking to other people. Slowly overcome your shyness by talking to other people.
Start by talking to at least one person a day. If you don’t know what to say, just listen to the other person. Being a good listener is a step to becoming a good conversationalist.
Be you. Show the real you when talking to other people. Don’t pretend to be somebody else. People will love you just the way you are, without pretenses.
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